Dreams

From "Meditations For Women Who Do Too Much" By Anne Wilson Schaef



And yet, all these years I'd been terrified I would be stoned to death if people saw through the facade. - Sara Davidson


How much time and energy we spend in impression management! We firmly believe that if we just dress right, others will think we are professional, intelligent, competent, and in control. We believe that if we just dress right, others will think we are attractive, sexy, desirable, and worth knowing. We think that if we are just caring, understanding, and constant enough someone will want to be with us.

We have such terror that someone will see through our facade and discover (our greatest fear!) that no one is there. We believe that if people really know who we are, they would have no interest in us. We believe that it is our impression management that keeps us safe.

OF COURSE, if someone falls in love with my impression, they aren't loving me, they're only loving my image.




This is a note to myself and all my women friends...

"A cloud does not know
why it moves in just such a
direction and at such a speed,
It feels an impulsion ... this is the place to go now.

But the sky knows the reasons
and the patterns behind all clouds,
and you will know, too, when
you lift yourself high enough to see beyond horizons."

~Masiah in the Illusions

Detach yourself of the clouds of negative thoughts ... relax and let go. You and only you can do it!

From Learning how to Learn by Idries Shah:

"But you must start where it counts: you cannot start halfway along and expect results. Mark Twain advertised as a hoax, that he had lost a cat so black that it could not be seen by ordinary light, and wanted it back. Nearly a thousand people contacted him claiming to have seen it. Would you begin to teach people or at least people in such a state of mind, anything?"

"The man is in the garden, cleaning the fish pond. Suddenly, the front gate opens, "she" walks past the man, oblivious of his presence, heads to the couch, adjusts herself on it and falls asleep in minutes .. like a small child - innocent and in peace. The man's wife joins him in the garden and gets startled by the presence of a 'sleeping beauty'. They both do not know, who she is. The man hushes the wife. They let her sleep, while continuing to mind their own businesses. After some time, she wakes up, bows to the strangers, and leaves the house as silently, as she had entered. "

Unfortunately, this is not for real. This is from a Korean movie, I watched few days back called, "3 Iron". The movie was very interesting, but I am not going to describe the plot of the movie here.

I carried forward a thought from the movie. The thought about how we have alienated ourselves to these species we call as 'Strangers'. A stranger is someone who we do not smile to when we cross the streets, who we look at suspiciously, who we ignore ... so many of them all around - and still we wander lonely - but do not stop by and say hello to one of them.

I am very much from this world. I know, today, when brother kills brother and employers layoff employees working for decades, who would trust strangers? When all gains in life are measured against money and power, you need to keep 'your guards on' all the time.

Still! Ever since, I have seen the movie, I am romanticizing the thought about a world, which would be just like that - with no boundaries and no restrictions.

Where, we do not ask strangers - "who are you?" with suspicion!